Three Months Can Reak Havoc

Wow. Three months gone, and you have no clue how much it has changed. Who knew that it could bring out so much trouble, blood (oh yes, blood - from the nosebleeds that I had from all the problems that faced me) and most of all pain.

Well, another reason why I haven't written on this blog is because I own a notebook where I right the same stuff pretty much all day, except it contains miscellaneous stuff as well. I was just not bothered going online I guess that I just pour myself out on a piece of paper.

Moving on, here's the things that have changed:

1. DingGit. There's really no more Tush anymore. Well, it's pretty much a long story and I'm not bothered explaining why. It's not that, but it was depressing in a way that I was afraid that I'll lose both of them - Virus specifically. The only thing was, Slexy ventured off from us and all because of some issues but who cares - now we're all cool. We're all good friends again, but just me and V... but yeah, I don't want to dig in this subject too much I guess.
2. School Certificate. Everything is fine, I guess, although English can be mind-wrecking. I apparently, did well on History - and Geography too. The rest was fine of course. Computers was awesome of course, and I think Maths and Science were cool too - except that I didn't get to finish the last couple of questions for Maths.
3. Troublemaker. Apparently, my parents thought I was a troublemaker and all, and I was failing at school. Well, they did checked up on me at school, realising that they probably just wasted my time because all of my teachers just talked about how wonderful I was at school and that I'm doing pretty well. At the end, they've cooled down - except for the fact they're having issues with how I speak back sometimes. At the moment, I am still in the recovery from the blow I've made again after they didn't let me sleepover at the Viruses. Long story.
4. The Sudden Departure. Well this mainly revolves on the fact that the Viruses had to move all of a sudden - an hour and a half away from my place. I couldn't blame them really. Their neighbour was somehow psychopathic and I've witnessed that after he intentionally parked his truck in front of the Viruses' garage before they had to leave. Plus, her parents had always dreamt of living near the beaches. Anyway, I guess this brought out the most pain in me and the stress. I ended up becoming like a pessimist again and fighting with V a lot of times - everyday actually, even now. I don't know, it's been a while since they've moved from the 14th of November, but it's still hurting me I guess. The thing is, I am very happy for them, but it just hurts me inside. I know it's not affecting V so much because apparently, she knows (well I think alike too) that we'll not get rid of each other (like "blood" as she put it today when we talked for almost an hour after not getting to talk on the phone for two days because I was in trouble) but I just don't know what it is going to be like for me. I don't know and I don't want to elaborate on this - it's making me go all devastated.
5. The Decision. Well, I'm not really sure what my final decision is, but after these past few days from the day I got in trouble, I've decided to make some great decisions. Well, the thing is, I haven't made it yet because I want to talk to V about it. I tell her everything anyway (for we had made this "unbreakable vow" which our friendship is the consequence if broken) and that's why she's usually the person I confide to. Always will and forever will, I guess. The decision will most likely affect my future and the path I'm going to, so I'm pretty scared and nervous about it. Six choices, one destination.

But yeah, I'm just all devastated with what happened, and it's killing me bad. I just don't know how to handle this and this decision could only be the one to help me. It's six choices with one destination. I'll let fate pick it for me, so whatever.

Anyway, I'll be asking my mum if I could actually stay at V's place for Friday. I know it'll be a question because we still have this tension after I got in trouble. I talked to her today though, although it's such a bad coincidence that I had to ask something from her at a time when I just got fine with them. I know they're going to think that I might be being cool with them because I need something, but I hope they'll know the truth. It's just I just miss V so much that it's almost like I'm going to go crazy. I don't know. She's just like my sister and it's hard not seeing her for so long. Not talking to her for a day would be torture too. GAH! So goodluck for me.

And oh, S and Tazzie will be hanging out with me tomorrow at my auntie's new place (oh yes - she has a new place with a larger space and swimming pool). Apparently, she wants me to hang out with those two only because she knows well that if V comes, I'll stick with her like glue and that I haven't hung out with them properly anyway for a long time. It kind of hurt her that she wasn't invited I guess, but I explained the reason to her - although badly.

It's like 1:43 am now, and I have to leave. I have to leave early for home tomorrow. That's all for now. This actually made me feel better. =]

PS: And oh, I told V she'll be the first and last best bud I'll have. I know I had one before, but that was when I was three. She's the first real one I have, and I'm not going there again. That reminds me, I gave her this ring that engraved "our nicknames = BF4L" as a goodbye/birthday present (as well as the Nintendo DS Lite and a huge bear that I saved from working tirelessly at McDonalds - oh yes, I'm working now). That's all really I guess. I just want to express how important she'll always be for me (as well as the rest of her family) - for she had brought back some of the old optimistic fun-loving me.